When it comes to the world of dating, it is super important to be able to take your man’s perspective into account. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could just understand how attraction works for men, how it really works?
Although every man is different, and will be attracted to different things and different women, there are a few common traits that men are attracted to in women. Some of them are slow to bubble to the surface; others are pretty obvious and can be initiated from the start.
One of the keys to a successful relationship is knowing what these keys of attraction are for men, and sustaining them over the long term. How attraction works for men is much easier than many women think. Here are a few key points to get you started:
Beauty. A no brainer right? Men like hot women. Beautiful women are attractive to men. The world of advertising is built on this basic evolutionary idea. A beautiful woman is something very special to a man, and when a beautiful woman pays attention to him, and maybe, even likes him, he is instantly attracted.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and every man will be attracted to different kinds of beauty, but a gorgeous woman is a very hard thing to refuse for any warm-blooded member of the male species. You don’t need to look like Angelina Jolie. Do your best to always look great around the man you are interested in.
He feels good around her. A man’s level of attraction towards one particular woman will increase if he always feels good around her. He will also on occasion be attracted to other women that make him feel good around them, but if he has one girlfriend or is married, his attraction to that woman will deepen over time because she has this way of making him feel great.
She compliments him frequently, says thank you when he does something nice, and she never seems to get caught up in drama or games and conflict. This kind of woman is easy to feel good around, and when he discovers this, his attraction will increase and he will simply want to be around her more.
She is quick to forgive. Women that constantly nag their boyfriend or partner over every tiny little thing become less and less attractive to their man over time. If something comes up and she treats it as no big deal, or expresses gratitude for an apology and lets things go, she becomes very attractive to him.
This laid-back behavior sends him the message that as they go through life together, she will not get stuck on anger over the small stuff. It goes back to being easy to be with. If a woman is constantly nagging him over dumb real or imagined mis-steps, it makes him feel like he can’t make her happy. This can hold true from the first date to the fiftieth anniversary. If he spills his wine on you on the first date and you freak out, he will remember that moment for many days, weeks even, after the fact.
This is not to say that you should ignore everything he does wrong. It’s more about how you handle his mistakes. If you fly off the handle over every little thing, and stack your resentments, it’s going to be hard to stay with you over the long term. Just think about it this way: would you enjoy being with someone who makes a big deal over every little thing you do wrong and mentions it for months afterward? Probably not.
Confidence is sexy. Men rate confident women as some of the most irresistible creatures on the planet. A woman who knows who she is but isn’t arrogant about it, isn’t afraid to go after what she wants but acts like her life doesn’t depend on it, and isn’t afraid to call someone’s bluff or call someone out, is very sexy to a man.
A strong sense of self-confidence is not something you can fake. If it isn’t real he will catch on quickly, and you’ll seem insecure or worse. This kind of confidence is the same thing that increases a woman’s attraction to men. If a man is bold enough to go after you, you find it sexy and appealing. The same concept applies both ways. If you carry yourself in the world like you don’t care what other people think of you intrinsically, he will be very, very attracted.
Often men rate confidence as more important than beauty. They will pass up a beautiful woman who isn’t self confident for a very confident, plain woman. Have you ever met someone who seemed to be of average attractiveness but also seemed to have the choice of any man she wanted? The answer was probably a strong dose of self-confidence.
A woman’s smile has power. This is one of the easiest ways to create attraction in a man, and many women don’t realize it. Women who smile frequently have active social lives because they are all of the above points rolled into one. They are confident, prettier, easy to be with, and probably forgive easily if they are smiling a lot.
A smile to a man you’ve never met before sends the message that you are approachable. A smile to a man that you are dating sends the message that you still like him and find him easy to be with. A smile to the man you are married to says, everything is going to be okay no matter what we are talking about or doing today. Women forget how powerful their smile is. A smile is such an easy tool to use to create attraction in men.
The Bottom Line- How Attraction Works for Men
The bottom line for understanding how attraction works in men is not put too much thought into it. Over thinking a man’s attraction may well just backfire. This is another one of those cases where men are much simpler creatures than we think. Smile more, look great without trying too hard, be easy to be around, forgive easily, and don’t act like the world depends on him calling you back, and he will think you are too good to be true. As you master these principles, his attraction for you will increase over time.